Good day ladies and gentlemen
Its honestly not going all well for me for the past week or so. I have had one of the worst cases of art block ever that its rendered me close to throwing a huge tantrum. Yes I have been sulking big time about it. Urgh I know I can draw for myself but no matter what my head tells me I wanna draw, my hands utterly destroy it its getting on my nerves and I honestly dunno what to do to get my art flare back. I am hoping college will be the thing to get me back in the game with art as being back in school I used to draw all the time non stop. I wish it was like that now but it seems beyond impossible.
Another kick to my sore heart today was the passing of my little boy Shinji. He was getting weaker and weaker as he got older but omg he had a little fire in him that kept him going but I guess that had to come to an end eventually. It never gets any easier losing a beloved pet. My little rat bum I already miss you I am just happy you warmed up to me in the end and you let me hold you and cuddle you that's all I could ever ask for. I hope your life was an enjoyable one
Now I am down to one rat. He was older than both Ico and Shinji but he has powered on, not showing any signs of giving in anytime soon. He is a fat happy rat....its unfortunate he isn't a friendly rat. I have tried everything with him but he still eyes me up with such hate. Just putting my hand in the cage he freezes over and then eyes up my fingers like they are evil....he wants to kill them.... and he has already bitten me a good number of times already.
He maybe a funny rat and unfriendly to people but I will persist and do what I have to make sure his life is a long and happy one.
I think I might have to say he will be the last rat I own..... The heart ache every time I have to say goodbye is painful and I don't know if I want to keep doing it. Or at least not for a long time, I think I should have a break from having pet rats (urgh that hurts just saying it). I think I will put the cage into storage then give the space it took up to my cat Mia. I was thinking on getting her a big cat tree that she can shred up (instead of my door frames) and jump on and all that
I think the best idea is to wait till in the distant or far future when I move out to a bigger place before I think about having more rats. My flat is pretty small so if I take up the old space with a cat tree there wont be any place to have the cage so no more rats....
Its gonna be so hard for me, just going to the pet shop to get stuff for the cat is going to be killer for me as they have the cages with the rats and other rodents in plain sight and I cant help but go over and say hello >.< Once I see a rat I just melt. I may even have to send my bf pet shopping solo so I don't get sucked in by rat cuteness. I know I would sulk big time if I couldn't have one >.<
My only chance which is very slim to have rats again here in this flat is if I could get a cage in the gap on my desk, its a pretty big gap and would be nice to have them where I can see them and do my work at the same time. I wont just squeeze rats into the gap if it is to small though coz that is damn cruel they need room to roam. I guess It would be a matter of having a look around.
AH it just makes matters worse thinking about how to keep rats in my life when I say that's it no more >.< I just love them so much.
Wow this journal ended up longer than I intentioned
Anyways that's all for now
For any of those who do read this Thank You
To my little rat bum Shinji Rest In Peace You will be missed sweet heart
And to all my rats who have been in my life and made me so happy I miss each and every one of you
Goodbye for now everyone
Details here: ladyrenatear.deviantart.com/jo…
HELLINX SPECIES IS CLOSED
Please do not use without my permission as it is a personal creation
Hōmon shite kurete arigatō <3